


Shatter

by epitaphofroses



Category: Kingdom Hearts
Genre: Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-07
Updated: 2020-02-17
Packaged: 2021-02-27 07:47:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 14
Words: 12,002
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22153507
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/epitaphofroses/pseuds/epitaphofroses
Summary: This was originally just going to be a Saix/Demyx fic, featuring Xigbar as Demyx's abusive ex-boyfriend, but it ended up being about more than just that and I very much apologize. There are descriptions of domestic abuse, drugs, and general violence. Please read at your own discretion.
Relationships: Demyx & Xigbar (Kingdom Hearts), Marluxia/Zexion (Kingdom Hearts), Saix/Demyx (Kingdom Hearts), Vexen/OC
Kudos: 4





	1. Broken

It wasn’t the first time I’d ended up in the hospital because of him, but this was going to be the last time, not that I knew that at the time. He’d broken five of my ribs, and had been dangerously close to breaking my sternum off into my heart. The nurses told me when I awoke that they’d had to re-break my nose because it had already started to heal. I guess he hadn’t taken me to the hospital right away, then.   
When I asked how long I’d been there, I was told that it had been nearly a month. I’d been in a coma. My stomach churned at this news, and I knew that I must have been fired from my meager job as a stock boy at the nearby grocery store.   
It was such a small town, a small hospital. Nearly all the doctors and nurses knew me by name, and I them. The doctor that came in to check my vitals was new to me, however. He told me that his name was Vexen, and that he was pleased that I’d woken at all.   
“You suffered a concussion due to head trauma, I thought you’d stay in that coma of yours for quite a long time.”   
The news made me swallow sharply, which made my chest throb even more painfully than it already did when I was just so lightly breathing. Vexen raised a brow at my expression, and called for more morphine. By the time I even opened my mouth to tell him that I was fine, a nurse had already come in with a syringe.   
She injected the clear liquid into the IV above the bed. After her task was done, she left, leaving me alone with the blonde doctor again. He asked the usual questions, as I expected. No doctor worth their salt didn’t ask them at least once every hour.  
Name? Kaoru Gensi. Blood type? O negative. Birthdate? On that one I blanked, but the doctor didn’t seem too troubled, reminding me that I’d just had severe trauma, partial amnesia is common in such situations.  
He began asking more personal questions, and I was surprised to learn that I remembered less about my life than I thought I would. I couldn’t even remember what my boyfriend’s name was. When Vexen finally exhausted his questions, he nodded to himself.  
Just as I thought, he muttered. When I asked what that meant, he just looked at me blankly before offering a mild smile. He told me he’d be taking me to a private clinic in the next few days, and that I should get more rest now.  
“Bones heal faster with sleep.” That was his departing sentence, and he gave me another smile. This one seemed less guarded than previous.   
When I opened my eyes again, the light above me was a different color than I remembered, whiter. I blinked a few times before looking cautiously around. It was a different room entirely.  
Vexen came into the room, carrying a manila folder and a clipboard under his arm. He didn’t seem to notice me right away, but I was too busy focusing on the changes to his appearance to be upset. Instead of the stark white doctor’s coat and the mint green scrubs from the day previous, the doctor was wearing a long black leather coat that covered anything he was wearing beneath.  
It was when he finally turned to look at me that the lack of noise struck me. There was no heart monitor incessantly beeping, annoying me or interrupting my sleep.   
Vexen moved quicker than expected. In the short seconds that had passed while I’d been pondering the quiet, he had appeared at my side, looking down at me.   
“I apologize, this must seem quite the change to you. I would have told you we were moving overnight had I realized everything had already been prepared for your arrival.”   
I allowed myself a minute to process his formal speech pattern, before shrugging, and then remembering just why that was a bad idea. Pain shot across my entire midsection and I let out a sharp breath. Vexen was already moving to give me what I assumed must be morphine, due to the circumstances.   
“You really shouldn’t be moving.” He chided me as he set the syringe on the table beside the hospital bed. It felt much more comfortable than normal ones. The doctor shook his head as he looked at the cast on my chest. “It’s the worst I’ve ever seen. You are quite lucky that it split you instead of killing you.”  
I was confused and asked what he was talking about. Vexen stayed quiet a long moment before explaining that I had become a Nobody, a creature without a heart and full of darkness. He continued on to inform me that it was pure luck that he’d been at the hospital. I’d almost been declared dead when they couldn’t find a pulse.  
“But the heart monitor? It was working fine.”   
My interruption seemed to surprise the man and he gave me another smile. Indulgent, almost.   
“Yes, yes it seemed that way. In fact, it was merely a trick, pulled off with help from a peer of mine. You needed to at least seem you had a heartbeat, in a human hospital, after all. Chasing away nurses coming to take your blood pressure was a nightmare. You were under my constant watch.” He seemed quite proud of himself.   
I was left alone, to process. I tried to look on the bright side. Better one half of myself instead of dead. It was a bit jarring to realize that my abusive boyfriend didn’t break my ribs, but then again he’d never go that far. He only ever caused injuries that could be easily explained away.


	2. Vexen's Notes 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The name Kraoux is pronounced the same as the word 'crow'. Vexen's notes add perspective and detail between chapters, you could view them as being filler as the information isn't strictly vital, but it's something worth knowing. Look at them as half chapters, considering they usually won't be very long. Vexen's note chapters will of course be in Vexen's point of view, and likewise any chapter titled with another character's name will be in their perspective.

In all fairness, Kaoru, or rather as we were calling him now, Kraoux, was a very good patient. Of course, it must not have been comfortable to stay still for as long as he had to, and I cannot blame him for moving. I was still monitoring him nearly constantly. He didn’t seem to have problems like anyone else, but him retaining only partial memories was a surprising difference from anyone else, so I’d been checking to see if he remembered anything new every day. He was rightfully irritated by now, so I simply told him to inform me of any differences in memory.  
As of yet, we haven’t figured out what his ability is, but it will be easier when he is able to walk around, I’m sure. For now, we’d simply have to wait it out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This installment of Vexen notes is not going to be the standard length, I apologize.


	3. Stress Cardiomyopathy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is the last of Kraoux being in the infirmary, or rather Vexen's lab. In the next chapter we'll explore with Kraoux meeting other members of the Organization. Some fore warning, I am not planning to write all of them in.

I’d been looking forward to getting up and walking around, but I hadn’t expected that it would still be painful. I was grateful with how patient Vexen seemed, particularly since he had no idea of my depression. Some days it had been so bad I couldn’t even move, and staying in bed for so long didn’t help me get over it.   
The night before, I’d heard Vexen talking with someone, and I asked who it had been. He’d blinked, like he’d forgotten something, and his lips had parted in his confusion before he shook his head a bit and looked at me again.  
“I suppose I neglected to mention that there are others here? My...employer and coworkers, I suppose you might call them.”  
I said that he hadn’t mentioned it, and he apologized. I told him not to worry, after all, being a medic is rather hectic, and I couldn’t begrudge him a few lapses in memory. He’d given me a dry smile at that, and thanked me for my consideration.   
He took an x-ray of my chest, and pointed out the different broken bones. They were almost completely healed now, so the cast would be able to come off soon enough. It wasn’t really a cast, exactly, I suppose. More like a compression belt? I don’t know, I’m no doctor.  
Vexen told me that after he took it off, that we’d be going outside.  
“You could really use some sunlight. All this time inside has made your skin grow pale.” With that somewhat rude remark, he left for the night.  
I sighed as I laid down on the bed, staring up at the darkened ceiling. I couldn’t remember very much of my life, but this was so strange to me. I felt like I was in a book, living all sorts of wild dreams you could only live out in writing.   
When I woke, Vexen was sitting in front of a computer, typing rapidly. I was impressed. That was the kind of typing speed I could only ever hope to accomplish, and I took typing classes in elementary and middle school. They were mandatory, but still sort of fun. To this day the smell of hand sanitizer sends me back to the simple times of chunky desktops and weird computer typing games.   
While I spaced out, Vexen noticed and acknowledged that I was awake, offering a morning greeting before going back to whatever it was he was working on. I returned the greeting, belatedly. He didn’t respond, but he did glance over when I stood, most likely making sure I didn’t topple over on my way to the bathroom.   
His comment had stuck with me and I looked in the mirror somewhat worriedly. Vexen had either been trying to make a joke, or was just being a jerk. I was the same peach tone as always. He was waiting for me when I left the bathroom, and his eyes seemed to be piercing.  
“Ready to be a freed man? In a sense, at least.”  
I gave my confirmation, and he removed the fabric, and I guess there was actually plaster involved. It felt nice to be able to take in full breaths again, at least. He tossed something at it, and I flinched as I caught it. It was leather, and when I lifted it, I discovered it was a coat just like his. He mildly mentioned that it was brisk out and I shrugged a bit, telling him that I like the cold. This made him take a bit of a pause before he told me I should wear the coat anyway, so I pulled it on.  
It was rather form-fitting and not my usual style, but it had some amount of appeal, and the inside was smooth and cool on my skin. Vexen gave me some new boots, and gloves as well, that I pulled on without any argument. He waited until I was fully dressed before leading me out of the room and down a hallway, past a few other doors and onto an elevator.   
We went to the ground floor, and he did in fact take me outside. The sun was brighter than I imagined and my vision went fully red as my eyes tried to adjust. I shielded them with a hand, and was startled when Vexen reached behind me, tugging a hood up over my head. I blinked and glanced at him. He wasn’t looking at me, walking to a small gate by the side of the building. I followed.


	4. Pneumothorax

Vexen and I were standing at the edge of a garden together now. He made a bit of a noise, lowly in his throat, and I was confused by it, and followed his gaze to where two others were dressed similarly to us. One had soft-looking pink hair, watering a rosebush as he chatted with the man next to him. He was a bit shorter, with hair that I wasn’t sure if it were blue or silver. I looked back at Vexen.  
“Is something wrong?” I asked, and he started, before focusing on me. It was obvious that he’d completely forgotten I was there.  
“Ah...No. Everything is fine, I just wish my son would work on his research.” He muttered.   
I was the one surprised now, and I looked back at the couple, confused. “Your...son?”  
He didn’t answer this time, simply sighing and approaching the two. The one with pink hair rolled his eyes at the interruption, and lowered his hose, letting go of the lever so it wouldn’t keep spraying. The other, whose face was mostly obscured by his hair, stepped back. Vexen introduced me to the pair. The almost floral-looking stranger’s name turned out to be Marluxia. He gave me a smile, and told me he was glad I was finally well.   
Zexion simply nodded. I realized then that I recognized him, at least a bit. He’d come into the lab late at night once, right before I’d fallen asleep. When I mentioned this, he stiffened, then relaxed. He said he was grabbing some important documents that night, and that he hadn’t known I was awake. He apologized for keeping me up.   
Vexen seemed satisfied, and turned to leave. Before he did, he told me that if I got bored I was to go inside and use the elevator to go to the second floor, where the recreational area and main kitchens were located. He said that he’d tell Xemnas I was well now, so that the arrangements for my floor would be finished.   
Nearly as soon as Vexen had disappeared around the corner, Marluxia caught my attention again, gesturing to the garden. He asked if I like flowers, and I told him yes. He seemed delighted by this news, asking me about my favorites. I thought a moment.   
“Orchids, I suppose. They’re difficult flowers, but well worth the effort. Water lilies are also nice. Oh! That’s what your hair reminds me of!”  
He smiled and told me he liked my enthusiasm. “It’s been a while since I’ve grown any orchids...Perhaps I should enlist Demyx’s assistance in making a nice pond for water lilies. What do you think, Zee?”  
Zexion had been quiet until then, and he gave Marluxia the faintest of smiles. “I don’t know, you’re the gardener. I’m sure Demyx would love to help, though.”  
Marluxia took me around the garden, pointing out certain things I could eat, and talking about certain flowers as he watered them until my head was spinning. Zexion followed Marluxia around, and I couldn’t help but notice that he seemed very attentive to everything the taller man was saying. I also took note of how Marluxia would sometimes brush a hand against Zexion’s as they walked, or give him a gentle smile here and there.   
“Oh, I see. Vexen isn’t sure how to handle you two dating. That’s why he seemed upset when he saw you guys in here.” I didn’t realize I’d spoken aloud until I noticed how quiet it was. Marluxia had stopped talking, and both men were staring at me. I raised my hands in defense quickly. “Ah, I just…”  
Zexion interrupted before I could apologize. “You’re right. How did you catch on to that so quickly..?” He seemed to be talking more to himself rather than to me and Marluxia touched his hand again, making the other smile and look up at him.  
“Is he...homophobic?” I asked tentatively, knowing it would be difficult for Zexion in an environment like that.  
Marluxia snorted, making me jump. “If he is, the Organization isn’t a good place for him.”  
Zexion giggled a bit, and shook his head as he regained his composure. “No, no, not that at all. He would just rather me stuck inside the laboratory all day, working on research. I wasn’t even really allowed time to myself until just recently. There was an...incident and Vexen had a change of heart.”  
I was strangely relieved to find that Vexen wasn’t suffering from a big case of bigot, which I chalked up to having been in his care while talking about being in a relationship with a man. I bid Marluxia and Zexion a good day then, and headed inside, curious to see the recreation room.  
There were a couple of other people inside when I finally found the right room. Most doors were either locked, or blocked off in the hallway, and I recognized the building as a hotel. Or it was once a hotel, I guess?   
One of the men inside had short blonde hair several earrings, giving him a somewhat pirate-ish appearance. The other had long black hair struck through with some grey that was all pulled back in a ponytail. I could see his face, since his back wasn’t to the door, and I was a bit alarmed by the eyepatch and scar curving up his face towards the uninjured eye. The two seemed to be playing some sort of card game together.  
The raven slammed his hands on the table, cards scattering everywhere. The chair scratched across the floor, the sound like a scream of protest that made the hairs on my arms stand up.   
“You filthy little cheater! There’s no way you won that hand!” He shouted, then looked up to see me standing by the door. He straightened up a bit. “Hey, you’re that new kid, yeah?”  
I nodded and the other man turned to look at me. He smiled a bit, and waved a hand full of cards at me.   
The raven gestured to himself. “Name’s Xigbar, and this scoundrel here is Luxord.” Luxord made a noise of protest at being called a scoundrel, and I smiled.  
“Ah, I’m Kraoux here, apparently.”   
The raven raised a brow. “Apparently? Oh, does that mean you’ve got memories of your past life?”  
I shrugged a little and nervously reached up to toy with a lock of my shoulder length purple hair. “Eh….Some of them. Vexen thinks I have head trauma-related amnesia.”   
Xigbar whistled, while Luxord simply looked sympathetic as he gathered up his cards. “That’s some shitty luck. Hey, wanna play a round with us?”   
I shook my head. Cards wasn’t really my thing, and they looked like they were about to blow at each other when I’d walked in. I came further into the room now to look around. There was a wide assortment of activities to do in here. Mostly group things, like pool or multiplayer video games. There was also a dart board, which caught my eye and I walked over, taking all the darts as Xigbar and Luxord started a new game. They’d both moved chairs, I guess so I wasn’t behind either of them? Did they really think I’d help them cheat?  
I found the taped line on the floor for the darts. It had been a while, so I stayed close behind the line at first, but after three bulls-eyes, I took a few steps back. After a while of throwing straight bulls-eyes, I felt eyes on me and I flushed at being watched, throwing my last dart. It missed the board completely, embedding in the door it was attached to instead.   
“Damn, I think he might be better at darts than you are, Xig.” Came the chortling accented voice from across the room.  
“Oh shut up.” I looked at the two in time to see Xigbar looking back down at his cards.   
I tried to mediate by pointing out how only having sight from one eye would affect his depth perception. It didn’t have the intended effect, as Xigbar stood and made his way to the dartboard, and pulling up all the darts. He stood beside me and threw each of them. All of them landed off-center, but in general the spread was nicely put together. When he threw the last dart, I saw it. He’d made a perfect circle.  
“I don’t have any perception problems.” He said seriously, and I grit my teeth a bit and then he placed a hand on my head, grinning. “But I know you didn’t mean to hurt my feelings or anything, so we’re cool.”   
Both Xigbar and Luxord left shortly after that, fighting over whether the other one was cheating or not.


	5. Xigbar in Retrospect

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I wrote this chapter with a playlist completely comprised of Cavetown. I just want to say right now that nothing romantic is going to happen between Xigbar and John.

It was nice getting to meet the new guy before I had to leave, I thought as I pulled my helmet over my head while making my way out to the parking lot behind the building. He seemed nice enough, maybe a little jumpy. It reminded me of when I was with Demyx…  
The thought made me frown. I really hadn’t been very good back then, and it disgusted even me now. Three years was a pretty long time to grow as a person, though. Xemnas forced me outta the hotel until I got my act together, got off the drugs I was doing. I’m glad he did now, but at the time I was so pissed.   
I showed up to the office a little early and walked into the waiting room, picking up one of the car magazines. I started reading, not paying attention to the time now. I heard the door open, and watched a patient exit the office. My therapist, John, smiled at me.   
“Give me a minute to put some things away, and then you can come in.”  
I nodded and looked at the article I’d been reading before the door had opened, then closed the magazine and set it neatly on the stack. John opened the door again and I stood, heading into the room. It was a nice space, made me feel calm. There were some oil diffusers in the corner. It was lavender today. Someone must have been having a bad time earlier, or something. Lavender was for anxiety.  
John and I talked about my day for a while. It was great Xemnas was cool with me telling my therapist about Nobodys and everything, or this would be such a hassle all the time. We made it to the topic of Kraoux, and him making it out of the infirmary.   
John of course had a few questions about it, and I explained what I could, but I didn’t know the extent of what the purple-haired man had gone through to fall to darkness.  
“Well, when you fall to darkness, it actually damages your chest, you see? Bruised ribs, maybe a heart attack before it fully changes you. Those are pretty common things, but considering how long Vexen was taking care of him, sounds like he had broken bones. It’s hard to say though, it could have been unrelated, like a broken arm or something. I don’t know why he’s a Nobody now, after all.” I shrugged a little as I thought about it.  
“Hm...Would that be something you want to know about?” John asked, adjusting the red frames on his face, grey eyes focused on my face instead of his notes.   
“What do you mean?” I asked, a little confused, and nervous due to his posture.  
John relaxed a little, and explained that I’d lead up to meeting Kraoux, like a surprise, and that I seemed more excited and animated than usual. “You sound like you might have a crush on this guy.”  
I froze at that. “What? I mean… I guess I want to try being his friend? He seems like a neat guy, and he’s good at darts. I don’t know about a crush though, I don’t really know the guy.”  
John nodded, and wrote something down on his notes. I’d always been curious about those, but I’d never tried reading them. Guess I really was getting better, then. He glanced at his watch.   
“Seems like we’re just about out of time here. I am glad you’re going to try making another friend, though. I’ll see you next week, Xigbar.”   
He gave me a smile as I stood, and then left. I considered his words on my ride back to the base. Friends are important, I knew that, and I could really use someone other than Luxord to hang out with. And I’d be damned if I didn’t get to challenge to a game or two of darts. Maybe I’d even let him beat me.


	6. Depression is the Enemy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kraoux, our darling main character, struggles to adjust to the life of being a Nobody. Xemnas refuses to send Kraoux on missions until he can fight, and spars with him.

After Xigbar and Luxord left, I’d played with the darts and shot some pool by myself until Vexen and a man I was told was named Xemnas. He seemed very serious, and it made me anxious. I didn’t want to mess anything up in front of him. He explained that he was the starter of the Organization, and that he’d be giving me orders if ever necessary.   
He didn’t stick around long, leaving me alone with Vexen, who suggested we head to my floor, so I could get used to my space. “We weren’t sure of any of your interests, so it’s rather plain currently, but if you ever want anything specific that you can’t find, let someone know and we’ll acquire it for you.”   
He bid me goodnight, and left. I watched the elevator close, then sighed and turned. I looked through most of the rooms. There was one that was a kitchen, and a nicely sized bathroom, and another that had a TV set up, and a stereo. There was also a record player in the corner, and I remembered mentioning having one in passing while talking about my memories with Vexen. Most of the other rooms where empty, but one was full of art supplies, and I thought I might check it out later.   
I found my bedroom. The walls were a dark purple, like my hair. I smiled a little, knowing that at least Vexen was paying attention to the little he knew about me. I found a package of those glowing stars in the back of the closet and used them to write my name on the wall opposite my bed.   
I thought back to what Vexen had said in the elevator. “This used to be someone else’s floor, but he moved floors a few years ago to stay with his boyfriend.”  
The stars must have been his, I hoped he wouldn’t mind my using them. It was getting late, and I was growing rather tired, so after I took my boots and coat off, I fell onto the bed and did my best to fall asleep. It took awhile, as I was thinking about my time in the hotel so far. Everyone I met had been pretty nice so far, even Xemnas hadn’t been outright mean to me. I thought that maybe that’s just how he is? Serious, and somewhat emotionless.   
My dreams were just brief flashes of things that night. They must have been about my boyfriend, considering in most of them I saw blood everywhere. I couldn’t remember what he looked like, though. Not even in my dreams. Maybe that was for the best, though. I got the feeling that if anyone found out who he was and what he’d done to me, there wouldn’t be enough left of him to identify.   
I woke to someone knocking on my door. I rubbed my eyes and looked at the window. The sun was shining brightly. I grit my teeth a little. I hadn’t meant to sleep so long. There was another knock.   
“I’ll be right there!” I called out, stumbling out of bed. I slid my boots and coat on, not that I really knew why.   
I opened the door to see Xemnas standing there. He looked down at me, raising an eyebrow. “Did I wake you?”   
I felt embarrassed, and wasn’t expecting him to apologize. I held up my hands.  
“No, I definitely should have been awake earlier! I’m sorry for sleeping so long!”   
He gave the barest hint of a smile, and told me to go eat something, that I would need the energy. I looked at him for a moment, then went back into the hallway. I thought it was weird that they’d built a doorway between the elevator and the rest of the space, but I guessed that it now made sense. Privacy.   
I looked in the fridge of my kitchen. It had been stocked with lots of different foods, and I saw fruits on the counter as well. I ate a banana and an orange as I waited for oatmeal to cook. Oatmeal with fruit was one of my favorite breakfasts. I added brown sugar and some milk when my oatmeal was done. I considered brewing tea, but I didn’t want Xemnas waiting any longer. I scarfed down my oatmeal, and then went back out to where Xemnas was waiting.   
He was sitting in a chair, eyes closed. He opened them when I shut the door behind me, and stood. He told me to follow, so I did. He was basically my boss, after all. He took me to a blank floor. It sort of looked like a dojo? All the rooms had been knocked out, leaving it as an open space. It was then that Xemnas explained to me about how Nobodies all had special abilities.   
“Since we haven’t figured yours out yet, sparring would appear to be the best way to find out.” He picked up two large sticks. Bo staffs? He tossed one at me, and I nearly dropped it. He was coming at me before I even righted myself, and I dodged him. It was brutal, Xemnas really didn’t seem to be pulling any punches, and wasn’t afraid to hit me. I noticed he was avoiding hitting my ribs, though. That was nice, at least.  
There was one point where I’d tripped backwards while trying to dodge another hit, and something on the floor cut my hand. Blood dripped onto the mat beneath us. It seemed really bright to me. I don’t know why, but right before Xemnas could hit me again, I flung my hand out. Instead of the blood splattering against him, it turned into ropes, wrapping around him and causing him to stumble and fall. I freaked out, looking at my hand. I didn’t see how, but Xemnas got out of the ropes. He discarded his bo staff and walked over to me, looking at my hand. When he’d gotten out of them, the ropes had turned into a normal amount of blood splatter against the mats and his skin.   
“Interesting...It would appear your power is blood. We should stop here for the day.” He lifted a hand, snapping his fingers. Silver figures appeared with mops and buckets, cleaning up the blood on the floor.   
Xemnas noticed my staring. “Those are Dusks. They’re low-level Nobodies, nothing special like the rest of us. Most Nobodies aren’t human-passing like we are, you see.”   
He helped me stand and we headed to the elevator together as the Dusks cleaned up the remains of our sparring match.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I would just like to say that this is the last chapter I'm posting without a schedule.   
> My tentative schedule will be posting one chapter every Friday. If I do end up missing Friday because of writer's block, then I'll do my best to get at least a Vexen Note chapter out to you all on the following Monday.


	7. Vexen's Notes 2

I was cleaning the laboratory for Kraoux’s extended stay when Xemnas and Kraoux himself had walked in. Xemnas explained about Kraoux’s power, and I asked to see the cut, wanting to disinfect it. When he held out his hand, there was dried blood, and I used a hand wipe to clean it, surprised to find there was no cut, but there was scabbing. I hadn’t thought to do any blood tests while Kraoux had been in the infirmary.  
I asked him if it would be alright if I took some and he’d agreed to it, asking what I was looking for. I told him the truth; That I didn’t know. Just any kind of difference compared to everyone else’s. He didn’t even flinch when the needle went in, though he did seem kind of tense. I took about a pint, for all sorts of different tests. I asked him to stay in the chair and that I’d bring him some juice in a moment.   
When I came back, with apple juice, Kraoux was touching his neck. I asked what he was doing and he looked away, appearing to be embarrassed. He told me he was trying to find a pulse and I gave the gentlest smile I could manage, telling him that we don’t have those anymore. He asked me how our blood flowed if we didn’t have hearts, and I wasn’t sure how to answer.  
Kraoux mentioned that he’d never been able to have his blood being drawn without passing out, and I considered that for a moment, passing him the juice. He drank it, then mentioned he didn’t even feel woozy. I decided to check his blood count. If I hadn’t been the one to take his blood, I wouldn’t have believed he’d lost any.   
I told him that he could leave if he wanted, but he asked if he could stay, explaining that he’d always been interested in things like this.   
Blood? I’d asked, derisively, thinking that was ridiculous.  
Not just blood! He defended himself, already seeming like a stronger person than he’d been when I first made him.  
All sorts of medical stuff! Blood did always draw my interest more than everything else, though. He finished.  
I nodded. It wasn’t unusual for our powers to be related to things we were interested in before. Zexion, for example, I thought, had always lived in the world of books and fiction. Illusions were just a more solid version of fantasy.   
I said I didn’t mind if he stayed, and actually taught him a few things while he watched. I discovered I really didn’t mind having him around. It was really nice to share my interests with someone, actually. Is this...what friendship is, I wondered?


	8. The Eccentric Artist

I had spent the entire previous day fighting with Xemnas, and then analyzing my own blood in the lab with Vexen. It was a rather odd day for me, but it gave me the boost I needed to get up early the next day. Too early. I’d gone down to the rec room and no one was up yet.  
Going back up to my own floor, I remembered that art room. I organized, as one might do when suddenly gifted enough art supplies to choke a horse. I set up an easel near the window for natural light, then stepped back to look at the room now.   
There was a desk in the corner with a typewriter. I wasn’t exactly sure why that was in there, but it did look nice, and I was tempted to use it. Later, I told myself. I spied some purple duct tape, and a thick Sharpie. I picked them up, and went down the hallway, labelling my rooms. Most were simply marked “Empty”.   
I headed back to the art room when I was finished, and decided to try painting. It had been a while since I had the chance, after all. My boyfriend didn’t like it when I painted. I pulled out the oil paints, and large canvas. Oil paints were my favorite, the smell always made me relax. I set my coat to the side, not wanting to get paint all over it. I supposed I lost track of time as I painted. For now it was just a field, and a murky sky, but I’d add to it later.   
There came a loud knock at my door, and I flinched, splashing myself with the paint water in my hand. I headed to the door, momentarily forgetting that I lacked a shirt, and opened it. Vexen was standing there and his eyes widened for a moment when he saw me before he went back to his usual state.   
“I brought your blood test results. It seems your blood rapidly replenishes, which makes you heal at a slightly accelerated rate when you get cuts, which could prove useful in a fight.” He made to hand me the papers, then noticed my hands were covered in paint. I stepped back and gestured to a side table next to me. He set them down, glanced at me once more, and then got on the elevator once more.   
I looked down at myself, deciding I could really use a shower. As I washed, I considered my apparent...would it be classified as a disability? It sounded like a sort of cancer. About all I knew about the disease was that it involved rapid cell growth, and was disastrous. Vexen hadn’t seemed worried, so it must not have been dangerous for my health.


	9. Xigbar and the Hand of Friendship

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In this chapter, Xigbar decides to take John's advice at trying to be Kraoux's friend, and ends up going on a mission with him to teach him the ropes.

I was hanging out in the rec room with Luxord like usual, today we were shooting pool together. We were chatting about our business, the casino we own together. It was a rare occasion that either of us actually visit, to check that everything was running smoothly, and there was a monthly check of surveillance. Luxord had just gone in for one, and was telling me about some funny things he’d seen on it when I heard the elevator door open. We both turned to look.  
Kraoux was stepping off the elevator. I stood up straighter and I saw Luxord snort out of the corner of my eye. I shook my head and smiled at the purple-haired man.   
“Hey you.” I spoke calmly, managing to keep my nerves under control. Kraoux looked up at me and gave a vague smile. There was a smudge of something blue on his chin and I started to reach up to wipe it off. I became keenly aware of Luxord leaning on his cue stick and watching me, so I turned the gesture into lifting my hand for a high five.  
Kraoux, being a good sport, smacked my hand. I wasn’t expecting someone so small to be able to slap so hard. I lowered my now stinging hand and covered the pain with a grin. “Kraoux, you’ve uh, got something on your face.”  
“Hm, do I?” He started patting his cheeks and I shook my head, tapping my own chin.   
“Nah, right here, it’s blue?”  
The man seemed to flush with embarrassment. “Ah, I thought I got it all off. I should have looked in the mirror before I came down here, I guess.” He sighed, then looked back up at me. “It’s just paint.”  
Luxord seemed interested now. “If you were working on your walls, you could always ask for assistance. I know I speak for both of us when I say that Xigbar and I would love to help you.”  
Kraoux looked confused, and then shook his head, laughing a little. “No, no! I was painting...like an artist. Because I am one. Erm...scenery, usually. Was working on a barn. Guess you could say I’ve got sky on my chin? Haha.”   
He waved then, and walked passed us to the joined kitchen. I took a deep breath, and Luxord turned to me with a smirk. I rolled my eye at him, and hoisted my cue stick. “Don’t say a word, I’m still kicking your ass at this game.”   
He made a face, and watched as I sunk several shots before missing one, because I was paying more attention to Kraoux leaving the rec room. Luxord managed to sink a shot, and gloated a bit, telling me that the guy I was into was a dork. He missed his next shot, and two shots later I’d won the game. He groaned, and forked over the 200 munny we’d bet on without much of a fuss. Pool was a great game for us to play because it was hard for either of us to cheat, but when you’re playing games with Luxord, cheating comes with the territory, just so long as you didn’t get caught, it was fine.   
I bid my blond pal a farewell when Xemnas sent me a message, telling me to come up to his office. I wasn’t worried, so I took my time, and stopped off at my own floor to snag my coat, assuming I’d be going on a mission. When I finally made it up there, I discovered this was in fact the case, and that I’d be taking Kraoux with me. The artist smiled, seeming mostly confused.   
Xemnas tossed the file at me, and explained that while Kraoux had his power figured out now, he’d need someone to show him the ropes. I could guess why he’d send me with him, and I gave Kraoux a bit of a smile in return.   
“Come on, craftsy, we’ve got work to do.” I gestured for Kraoux to follow me.  
To his credit, Kraoux didn’t even seem surprised by the nickname. He just fell in line behind me, a step to the right. It felt like he’d had previous soldier experience, or something. He was just perfectly in flank. I was about to ask if he’d been in a war when I spotted a familiar pair coming off the elevator. Saix’s bright eyes followed me, and his grip on Demyx’s hand tightened, who in turn looked up at his boyfriend with a little nervous smile. I grit my teeth, trying not to hurry out of there. I could still feel wolf boy’s eyes boring holes in me even when Kraoux and I made it into the elevator, but I sucked it up enough to turn around, hitting the button for the ground floor a bit harder than I meant to.  
Kraoux didn’t miss this, giving me even more reason to believe he’d been a soldier. He asked if I was okay. It made me feel...warm. John was the only other person who ever asked that. Luxord just kind of always assumed I was okay, which was alright, and I saw why he’d think that, based on how I acted.   
“Hey, I’m fine, don’t worry about me.” I smiled down at the other, but he didn’t seem convinced, but I thought he’d dropped it until he opened his mouth again.  
“Who were those two in the hall?” They were innocent enough words, but looking into the artist’s grey eyes, I knew he was gauging my reaction to see if it was the thing that bothered me. It worked, though. I’d jerked back a bit, and then sighed, running a hand over my face.   
“They guy with blue hair, his name is Saix. He’s the Organization’s second-in-command and...he doesn’t like me very much, but for good reason. The blond he was with, that was Demyx.” My voice twisted on the musician’s name, and I noticed Kraoux’s stance changed a bit. I ignored it for the most part, continuing. He needed to know. “Demyx is my ex-boyfriend. I was...very shitty. Toxic and abusive to the extremes. Saix and Xemnas actually butted in one time when I sent Demyx to Vexen. It’s a good thing we don’t die easy, or I woulda killed the kid.”  
I did my best to not look at Kraoux’s face as I kept going. It was nice talking about it to him, actually. Freeing, somehow. Helping in a way telling the story to John had never been. “They officially kicked me out for using drugs, but I knew better than that. When I sobered up, and started therapy, they let me back in. I’ve been trying to get better, and make it up to Demyx, but Saix is always with him and doesn’t let me get near him. Today was actually the closest I’ve physically gotten to either of them without it turning into a fight for four years.”   
As the last of my words finally faded away, I looked down at Kraoux again. He wasn’t looking up at me anymore, and I swallowed. After a moment, though, he looked me in the eye. “The first step to getting better is admitting you have a problem. It especially takes a lot of balls to talk about that kind of thing with someone you don’t know very well. So...good for you. I’m proud of you.”  
The warm feeling came back and I reached up to ruffle his fluffy, shoulder-length, purple hair. I actually regretted putting on my gloves, I really wanted to know how it felt. Soft like it looked, or was it dry from the bleaching process? I dropped my hand before it got weird.   
“Well, I certainly ain’t gonna let anything happen to ya on our mission.” I said it confidently. I wasn’t expecting the response I got, though.   
“Oh, is it going to be dangerous?” Kraoux’s eyes were silver now, and innocently looking up at me.   
“Er--”  
“And here I thought Xemnas was just beating the crap out of me for fun.” Those eyes widened, then slowly turned to the ground as his lips pursed. “Hm.”   
As if I knew what to say to that! I kept quiet until we got to the ground floor, and then took him out to the garden. Marluxia was chilling on the bench and greeted us. I gave a simple nod before opening a portal to darkness, and held my hand out for Kraoux to take. He just looked up at me with furrowed eyebrows and disdain.   
I stepped into the portal, and he followed. We arrived on our world of choice, and it was almost immediately that a Heartless ran by. I summoned my guns and shot the fucker. I turned to look at the artist, who was looking at my guns.   
“Aren’t you going to summon your weapon?”  
“I’m sorry, my what?”  
“I’m going to shoot Xemnas when we get back to the hotel.”  
“Oh.”  
I sighed and used the barrel of one Arrowgun to scratch the back of my neck. “Just do your best to not get injured while I take care of our assignment, okay?”   
I didn’t see it coming, it was on my blind side. The Heartless speared me in side with a horn and splashed my blood across Kraoux’s face. I watched him lick his lips reflexively, and watched his eyes as it registered on him. I wasn’t expecting him to suddenly disappear, but he did. I heard the sound of guns going off, and I turned, holding my side as blood gushed out of the hole. Kraoux was holding duplicates of my Arrowguns, his face devoid of emotion, it was only action now. A shudder ran down my spine because for a split second it was like looking into a mirror. I slid down the tree behind me to sit, closing my eye a moment to draw in a few breaths.   
When I opened it again, I was looking up into the flourescent lights of Vexen’s infirmary. Did Kraoux carry me? What the hell had happened?  
The artist in question leaned over me, anxious. When he saw I was awake, he smiled, but it didn’t touch his eyes. They seemed guarded, a little preoccupied.   
“Hey, I never told you you could get hurt!” He frowned teasingly at me now and I snorted. This time the warmth from his smile melted the ice in his eyes.   
I sat up and he stepped back from the bed. “Did you carry me back? Did you finish the mission?”  
Kraoux laughed. “I mean, the Heartless seemed pretty drawn to your blood, but I wasn’t exactly keeping track, just kinda shot whatever shadows seemed to move.”   
I noticed he didn’t answer the other question, but I smiled all the same. “Shit, guess that’s really on me, I’ll have to tell Xemnas to lay off of you.”  
The purple-haired man seemed surprised now. “Actually, he said I did a good job.”  
“Huh, really? Didn’t know he knew how to compliment people.”  
Kraoux’s laughter was infectious, and soon I was just happy to be around him and away from the Heartless.


	10. Vexen's Notes 3

As it turned out, Kraoux’s blood ability was more than just manipulating his own blood. He could use other’s blood to wield their powers. He’d come back from the mission with Xigbar bleeding in his arms and explained everything that happened in a panic, and I assured him that the gunslinger would be alright.  
I had him drink a bit of my blood to test whether the effects were correlating to the events, and he ended up freezing me with my own power. Of course he was very apologetic over the incident, but it was an interesting perspective for myself. I suppose I rather enjoyed it.   
In the midst of treating Xigbar’s side wound, I did take some of his blood for retainer, and Kraoux’s use. I refuse to feel embarrassed or ashamed of wanting the artist to have the most advantages that he can. I’m curious about what the others’ blood would do to him, since he seems to gain some of our mannerisms when he uses our blood, at least until it’s integrated into his own blood. It takes perhaps a few hours. I never realized that I acted so cold towards everyone until Kraoux was refusing to help me in favor of his own work, his paintings. It is nice to know that he doesn’t gain memories or our interests.  
I wrote up a report on the mission for Kraoux, explaining in them my experiment for Xemnas to read. He’d seemed interested, though he told me to hold off on experimenting with anyone else’s blood for the time being. I’d reluctantly agreed, and Kraoux had come to visit myself and check on Xigbar’s progress. I don’t know why, but for some reason I felt a twinge whenever the purple-haired man asked out the injured one.   
I’ll have to look into it, I suppose. It’s hard to concentrate on my work when I don’t understand certain… feelings.   
I’ve been getting everyone to allow me to draw their blood for testing on Kraoux when Xemnas allows it again. It was easier to get blood from Saix and Demyx than I thought it would be. Xemnas had allowed me to take his blood, but reminded me not to experiment yet. I wondered what he was waiting for?   
Axel didn’t seem to hear what I asked, but I did get his blood. I hoped it would still be alright for Kraoux with that much alcohol in it. Ever since Roxas dumped him, Axel had been rather listless.   
Marluxia had been somewhat tentative to allow me stick a needle in his arm, and I did perhaps use a bit more force inserting it than necessary. Zexion was there, of course. Holding his hand. He’d plainly refused to give me any blood, as did the rest of the Organization. That was fine, five people had agreed, and I had Xigbar’s and my own blood already.


	11. Violence Isn't the Answer

Xemnas woke me up again the morning after Xigbar had been released from the infirmary. Standing next to him was someone I didn’t recognize, and I knew everyone else in the tower by now. He looked similar to Xemnas, I supposed, his hair was styled differently, and his skin was a bit darker.   
“This is Ansem, he is my Heartless.” Xemnas explained, then introduced me to Ansem while I was left confused. Ansem seemed to notice this, flashing a grin.  
“I’m the only humanoid Heartless in existence. It’s what happens when your heart is impossibly strong. I wasn’t always humanoid, though. We don’t really talk about it.”   
I nodded, less confused now. Xemnas explained that Ansem didn’t really live in the tower, and could control other Heartless. It was always a better idea to not use our powers while Ansem was staying there, as even the ones under his control were violent, and might attack someone they viewed as a threat.   
I puffed my cheeks out a bit at the news of this, and nodded. I wondered if Vexen would be less upset now? He’d seemed a bit disgruntled at not getting to see what everyone else’s blood did to me.   
Even though Ansem was there, Xemnas did send us on missions. I got sent out with Marluxia this time, and the world was full of plant life. The pink-haired man seemed pretty pleased with this, and gave me a smile.   
“So you’re the reason Vexen wanted my blood? Hah, I thought it was because Zexion and I are engaged!” He told me about how he’d told Vexen. He took his hands, and leaned in, then whispered in his ear, “Your son and I are getting married.”  
I tilted my head a little. “I don’t support your tactics, but congratulations on the engagement, all the same.”  
Marluxia smiled, and a scythe appeared in his hand just before a group of Heartless bounded up to us. He sliced them down, not really giving me a chance to do anything, and I’d even managed to summon...a weapon? It was a paintbrush, about the length and width of a bo staff, or a spear. Marluxia glanced over me when he’d finished with the Heartless.  
“Well, that’s not something you’d expect to see every day.”   
I shrugged a little, the paintbrush disappearing from my hands. “Not...sure how useful it would be in a fight.”  
He leaned on his scythe, smiling in a gentle way. “Zexion’s weapon is a book, Vexen’s is a shield. They aren’t all fancy, obvious weapons.”   
His words were a little reassuring, and we continued our mission. It turned out that my paintbrush was rather versatile. It didn’t break, even when I used it like a bat, and the brush end sliced through the Heartless. I tested it when we were in the clear, and it didn’t cut me. How...confusing.   
We finished up the mission, and headed back to the tower. I went to the communal kitchen, snatching some leftovers from breakfast as a snack. I turned to leave, running into the blond I’d seen outside Xemnas’ office with Xigbar. Demyx. He was one of the few I hadn’t actually interacted with, yet. I’d had one short conversation with Saix, in passing.   
He gave me a tentative smile and seemed like he wanted to say something. I waited, gathering he wasn’t exactly the brave sort from things I’d heard about him.  
“Hi, I’m Demyx..”  
I nodded a little. “I’m Kraoux. It’s nice to officially meet you.”  
He smiled again, hesitating again. “So...I’ve heard you’ve been hanging out with Xigbar a lot lately. I know he’s trying to change but...you should still be careful…”  
I let out a short breath. Ah, yes. I remembered Xigbar talking about this. I gave Demyx a smile to reassure him. “Don’t worry, I’m fine. He really is better, you know.”  
He nodded, though he still seemed worried. I heard someone call for him, and he smiled as he looked over his shoulder. “Be right there!”  
He turned back to look at me again. “Well...it was nice meeting you Kraoux.” He smiled, then walked off to go to the person who’d called him.


	12. Wedding

It had been a few months, and I’d fallen into the rhythm of how things worked in the Nobody-filled hotel. Marluxia and Zexion had finally announced at large that they were engaged and everyone was helping with the wedding plans.  
Luxord was going to marry them on his ship, as any captain might be capable of. Marluxia himself was often seen pouring through wedding magazines to try to find the perfect floral combinations. Demyx got put in charge of music, and most nights you could hear him and his water clones practicing in the days leading up to the wedding.   
It seemed like everyone was excited, even Xemnas mentioned that he’d been looking forward to it. Everyone was excited, except Vexen. I started spending more time with him than ever, we tested the blood he could get from everyone. Testing Axel’s blood had left me almost in tears. I didn’t know Axel very well, and I certainly hadn’t known his power was fire.  
It had taken Vexen quite a long amount of time to assure me that I was alright, and that since I was in control, the fire couldn’t do anything I didn’t want. It was times like that that Vexen seemed the most like his usual self, but sometimes I would walk into his lab and there would be papers flung all across the room and his head would be in his hands. I’ve never been all that great with words, so I’d either pick up his papers, or sit next to him with a hand on his shoulder.  
Today when I went into his lab, he was arguing with someone. I couldn’t see them, and I considered going back up to my rooms, but I worried that something might happen. I finally recognized the other voice when it started yelling.   
“WHY CAN’T YOU JUST BE HAPPY FOR ME? EVEN XEMNAS IS HELPING! I’M NOT A SLAVE, VEXEN. I CAN LIVE MY OWN LIFE, AND I DON’T CARE IF YOU’RE A PART OF IT IF YOU CAN’T EVEN PRETEND YOU’RE HAPPY THAT I’M HAPPY!” Zexion ran passed me, tears falling down his cheeks.   
I hesitantly walked further into the lab to find Vexen standing there, hands clenched into fists. The room was freezing. I walked up to him. “Vexen...are you alright?”  
He didn’t turn right away, but I watched his stance relax slowly. When he did turn there was a false smile on his face. He told me he was fine, and that we wouldn’t be testing today. I didn’t want to leave him while he was in this state, but I eventually obliged, and went back up to my rooms, where I painted a snowy forest.  
The day of the wedding, everyone portaled to Luxord’s ship, each going at different times. We were all dressed fancily, Larxene was even wearing a dress. I did help arrange chairs, and everyone took their seats. Vexen sat in the back, and I joined him, giving him a small smile. I thought I noticed someone glance back at me, but when I looked around everyone was facing forward.   
Zexion was standing at the altar, and Marluxia came out to join him shortly. They were both dressed in shades of lavender, which I greatly appreciated. I never have been one for ceremonies, and it took all of my control to keep still through the entire wedding. I helped, I think, that Vexen was sitting next to me. The cold coming off from him kept me grounded.  
“If anyone has an objection to this union, speak now or forever hold your peace.”   
I felt everyone collectively hold their breath, and saw several glances in Vexen’s direction. He stayed quiet, staring straight ahead. I don’t even think he was actually looking at the trio under the flower arch at all. I saw Zexion give a relieved smile when Luxord moved on, and he finally relaxed. He must have been tense all day, fretting over that moment.  
When Marluxia and Zexion kissed, all the flowers around the deck started to shed petals, swaying in the wind, and illusions of butterflies danced over us before fading away. Except for getting the chairs moved, the transition from ceremony to reception was smooth. Demyx had brought along some CDs for dancing music, confiding in me that knew not a lot of the Organization enjoyed the sitar. I personally thought it was nice.  
I was mildly surprised when Xigbar walked up to me. He seemed nervous and I was about to ask if something was wrong when he smiled and offered me his hand, asking if I’d like to dance with him.  
I accepted, and he pulled me to the dance floor. It was a slow song, and he held me close, smiling at me a little ruefully.   
“You know, I was going to ask you out before.”  
I blinked at this news, and tilted my head at him. “Why didn’t you?”  
He smiled again, slowing the dance further. “I decided I’m not ready for that. To date, I mean. As if I think I ever will be.”   
He chuckled, and as the song ended we walked off the dance floor together. “But if I ever do feel like dating...and you’re single...I hope Italian sounds good.” He smiled at me again, before walking away.  
I stood there for a while. I hadn’t even realized Xigbar liked me in that sort of way. As I thought, I noticed Vexen standing in the shadows, and I walked over to him, looking in the direction he was facing. We watched Zexion and Marluxia dancing and laughing together. They looked very happy, and it made me wish I had a sketchbook on me so I could draw them.  
I looked at Vexen again and smiled at him. He looked down at me for a while before smiling back. It may have been the light, but for a moment, I could have sworn he’d been crying. After a few minutes of comfortable silence, I asked if he wanted to dance.   
“I’m not much of a dancer.”   
“That’s okay.” I smiled, taking one of his hands in mine, the other up on his shoulder. He put his other hand on my back, looking at me with a confused expression when we didn’t start moving.  
“What are we doing?”  
“Dancing in place.”  
“Oh, I see.”  
There was a pause, and then he shifted a bit, holding me closer as the music changed.  
“This is rather nice.”


	13. Lunar Madness

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter has some sexual content, please read at your own discretion.

Since the wedding, I’ve felt more comfortable all around. Xigbar and I hung out, playing pool or throwing darts with each other. It was nice to have a friend, though he’d assured me that if I didn’t want to spend time with him because of the confession that I didn’t have to. I’d told him that it wouldn’t be awkward unless he acted awkwardly, and so far it had been just nice.  
The only person I got nervous around now was Vexen. I wasn’t really sure why, nothing had happened between us, but I tried not to spend a lot of time alone with him now. The only time we were ever really alone together was for blood testing, and we’d long since been finished with that.   
I was on a mission alone that day, and had used Saix’s blood to overpower several larger Heartless. It did turn out that everyone’s blood had a different period of life in my body, so to speak. Axel’s was the quickest, with a usable time of about ten minutes, I assumed mostly due to his ability being fire, it burns itself out. I could use Vexen’s ability for several hours, and Xemnas’ for nearly a whole day.  
We hadn’t figured out how long Saix’s blood was live, and I didn’t know that it mattered until later that night. It was a full moon, and while I’d heard jokes about Saix being a werewolf, I’d never taken any stock in them, it was like the others calling me a vampire. I didn’t mind those as much as Saix minded the werewolf ones, though.  
I had painted when I returned from my mission. Painted, then showered, and now I was winding down for the night with a nice book when I felt a burning take over my body. My vision blurred as my other senses sharpened.   
My head went fuzzy, and I’d only remember the details of this night later, with some explanation from Vexen. As it turned out, Saix had a bit of a problem. Whenever a full moon came around, he’d become more beast-like and would find whoever it was that he had feelings for, and have sex with them. I’d heard that it was usually Demyx, but that it had been a catalyst for why Roxas had left Axel, as well.   
In this state, I made my way down to Vexen’s lab, who was surprised to see me. I’d pushed him against a wall, arms around him. He had hugged me back, confused and mildly alarmed, thinking something was wrong. It was when I bit his neck and slid my knee along the inside of his thigh that he realized I must have taken Saix’s blood and that it wasn’t out of my system...meaning that I was into him.  
Everyone was aware that if the victims fought, Saix would get violent in one of those moods. Roxas had almost lost an arm trying to keep him from Axel, and had to spend several days with Vexen to repair the nerve damage.  
I could feel Vexen swallowing, my tongue against his throat. His breath felt cool against the top of my head, and I pressed further into him, whimpering in his ear now. He closed his eyes, and held onto me even as I rubbed my knee over his groin. I kept going until I could feel it pressing into my leg.  
I could smell the arousal coming from his skin, and licked his neck again. This time he leaned his head back, and I bit the other side of his throat. He let out a low noise, and I did it again.   
He tried to worm his way out of my hold, which made me whine and grab onto him again. He calmed me with a few kisses, and guided me to his bedroom, holding me close and taking slow steps so I wouldn’t think he was trying to run.   
“There. See, Kraoux, it’s alright. I just wanted a little more privacy, that’s all. We wouldn’t want someone to come in on us.” Between words, his lips touched my throat, my shoulders. They felt cool and soft.  
His hands ran over my clothes slowly, feeling my different shapes, so I did the same to him, and he pressed his lips against mine. His hand cupped the bulge in my pants and I let out a low whine of need. He’d chuckled when I got on the bed on all fours, leaning down on my arms to put my ass in the air.  
“I didn’t know you were like that, Kraoux. You’re always so full of surprises.”   
I could hear clothes falling to the floor, and when I looked back at him, he was fully nude. It sent another wave of warmth through me. I watched curiously as I pulled some things from a drawer that he set on a table next to the bed.  
He stood, facing me again, and gestured for me to come to him. I did, pressing my face against his chest and breathing deeply, enjoying the wintry smell of his skin. His hands found their way to my hair and tangled, pulling back. My mouth fell open in a silent moan, and his blue eyes were curious. He smiled then.   
“So you do like that.” He kissed my lips, then my neck. He bit me like I’d bitten him earlier and I grabbed his shoulders, nails scratching his skin and holding myself against his body.  
“Vexen...Vexen!” I moaned and squirmed.   
I could hear his chuckling, feeling his breath waft over the sore area of my flesh. He helped me out of my clothes, then shoved me down onto the bed. He smiled down at me, Picking something up from the table. It was a glove, and over the glove he poured a thick, clear liquid. Lube.   
He leaned over me, admiring the way I quivered when he got close. With his ungloved hand, he gently grabbed hold of my aching member and started slowly pumping it as he found my hole with the other hand. He rubbed slowly with one finger, swirling. My penis twitched in his hand and he smiled, continuing to massage for a while before pushing one finger in.   
I gasped, then let out a whimper. He used his finger to start easing my hole open, sliding in another soon enough.   
“That’s right, Kraoux.” He said softly as I bit one of my hands, taking his own off my member to grab my free hand. “Here, why don’t you touch me?’  
I leaned down to take hold of him, biting harder as I rubbed, and he pressed yet another finger into my backside. His soft moans drove me wild, and I ended up pushing him off me. His eyes showed his surprise and he watched me slip to my knees before him.  
I pulled my hand from my mouth, deep marks from my teeth in my skin. I kept one hand wrapped around his member, holding it until I closed my lips around part of his length. He groaned and tangled one hand in my fluffy purple hair. I enjoyed the way it made my cheeks feel bulged as I sucked and started to bob my head.  
I took in a deep breath before pushing myself to hold all of his shaft in my mouth. He groaned and pulled my hair again. I gripped my own penis to start pumping myself to his noises of pleasure. I pulled back to breathe, then went back to sucking, Vexen using the hand in my hair to guide me along his shaft, bobbing my head himself.  
He warned me before he came, and I took more into my mouth, and bobbed a bit after, a bit of the cum and saliva mixture in my mouth dripping from the corners and onto the floor and my knees. I pulled off and swallowed the rest. Vexen lifted me and tossed me onto the bed again.   
He climbed over me, returning his fingers to my ass to make sure I was still ready. He took the glove off and tossed it in the trash without looking. The blond picked something else up from the table, and opened it. Vexen slid the condom onto himself with a soft noise.  
He kissed me as he guided himself to my hole. I helped by lifting myself off the bed a little, and he pushed the tip in, then guided me back to the bed. Vexen used both hands to hold himself up and looked down at me, whimpering and sweating underneath of him.  
“You’re so lovely, Kraoux.” He kissed me again, then started to rock his hips.  
Every thrust of his hips made me feel hotter until I coated us with some white. Vexen groaned in my ear, and suddenly we were rolling until I was laying on top of him. We weren’t connected in the same way anymore but that was alright. I fell asleep, cuddled into his chest.


	14. Vexen's Notes 4 -- Epilogue

When Kraoux woke the morning after our...time together, he had been embarrassed and confused. I’d filled in the parts he didn’t remember as I stroked his back and played with his hair. It had been nice, waking up with him in bed with me. ~~Is this how Zexion feels with Marluxia?~~ I decided that I didn’t want to think about that. The two of us had stayed in bed together for some time, talking about the events of the night previous, and where to go from there. For the most part, things stayed the same. He continues to spend time with Xigbar. ~~I am admittedly jealous of how much time.~~ He still spends much of his time painting up on his floor, while I work on my research. Certain things have changed. I now have a better relationship with my son, and also Marluxia, and Kraoux and I often have conversations with them in the garden. I also worry more when he’s gone for long missions, and sometimes I slip up to his floor and go to his art room to be surrounded by the smell of oil paint, which clings to him no matter how well he showers. I even pull myself away from research for little things now. I go on walks, and spend more time with the others. We’ve been together for several months now, and yet I still feel dazed every time I touch him, kiss him, knowing he’s mine. It’s nice. There are days where we’re at odds: He can get upset when I’m in my lab for too long, and I am not exactly pleased when he gets paint on my documents, but we always talk things out and there hasn’t been a morning where we haven’t woken up next to each other. Ah, I need to stop typing, I can hear him talking with Zexion near the door. They must be waiting for me to join the group for dinner. The last thing I’ll put now is this: I am grateful to have met Kraoux. I love him.


End file.
